1790 - 1865
Challenges
Rural life in the mid 1800’s was lackluster, bordering on tedium and any opportunity to see something different was welcome. A special event ‘even one in their ‘own township range’ was always well attended. The entire week was always devoted to farming and farm chores and the evening was individually designed and filled according to the makeup and temperament of the family and their income.
The class castes were gentry or working class or gentry and for ease and comfort one stayed in their own income community – the community where they fit in the best. In those days the welcome greeting was either “Howdy” or Good Day and men tipped their hats no matter if gentry or not, the hat was tipped. The shopkeeper or farmer addressed the gentry by ‘Sir’ and ‘Mam’ yet his friend was called by name. Men rode on a horse or mule or he traveled on a wagon or in a carriage or he walked.
Perhaps he lamented the mode of his travel but this was the way most men, children children, and women traveled, and lamenting the mode of transportation got them know where and he was not the only one.
This was a sign of the times, getting to the event was the goal. How they got to any event was dictated by their standard of wealth. But anything with wheels or four hooves was better than walking on your two feet; and much faster.
In rural America in the mid 1800’s men were out and about but the wife/mother had little chance of escaping domestic duties since women were the heart of the domestic scene. This was her lot yes this is what she wanted, if she chose her suitor wisely then she was content. If she made a mistake in her choice of mate she had few options. Divorce was possible but that would cost money - money she didn’t have.
A man could divorce his wife if he chose to do so, but divorce was a rarity in rural townships. Women aged quickly in those times. She had a dress she wore for working on the farm and if she was lucky she had a dress for church. She didn’t paint her face or her nails; get a tattoo she didn’t buy perfume or shave under her arms or legs. A mirror was not part of the rural home décor. She was clean as she could be if she had access to a plentiful supply of water but there were no daily showers or long hot soaks in a bathtub.
Her ‘monthly’ was dealt with in the way of the times. There were no patented pads in a box to be found on the shelf in the shop, she had no money to buy them if such things were available then, not in this era – she used materials at hand and dealt with it as best she could. And no matter if she had a mirror to see herself she would fit right in with the rest of her peers and so would he, his wardrobe was as limited as hers.
The FARM was LIFE - everything they did was centered on the farm itself. Life was hard and harsh but she knew it would be and she went into marriage with her eyes wide open, she had to - there were few surprises for her. If he was lucky she knew how to cook, knit and sew. She knew how to do all the other household chores. When she married – she submitted for the most part since she had few ‘legal rights.’ She could not vote, she might have had an opinion but it did not matter. Women did not have the ‘right’ to vote.
Even when she had a baby at her breast and a number of ‘Little’s scurrying around and for the most part she submitted when he wanted sex, saying no was unlikely and yes likely she wanted what he wanted and she had so little in her life she was willing to forget about the event happening nine months later and so she lifted her skirts and spread her legs, thinking – hoping ‘perhaps she would not conceive this time- perhaps;’ but If she did conceive she accepted this as the price for a moment of ecstasy.
If there was a social event the women, even a mother with a baby went along to any event or she stayed at home. But likely she went along because going to any event at all was an opportunity to relieve the harshness and tediousness of her life. The young girls went because the young boys went. It was always a time for dreaming and looking. The infant went and grandma too, this was an opportunity for the women to gossip or exchange a clipping of a plant or learn a new knitting pattern.
No matter the following day would be a variation of the previous day, week, month, or year. The younger men went because it gave him the opportunity to find a pretty girl, the older man went to see how well his neighbor’s crops were doing and/or to indulge in a measure of whiskey and/ or to hear the word of God depending on the event.
But no matter why he went he had to be up before or with the rising of the sun since the cows needed milking, the ground needed plowing, and water needed to be brought in for cooking, and a myriad of other farm chores needed to be done. The farm was a little god always demanding attention and tending and he better pay attention to it otherwise he and his family starved.
The gentry may have gone to a restaurant for a meal on a rare occasion but this was an unheard-of unknown luxury to the rural farmer like my great-grandfather who likely only went into town to get the supplies he could not grow or manufacture on his own and while he was in town he learned the prices his crops would bring him at the harvest. He also learned the latest local or national news, he also found out who was sick or died. He learned what local illnesses were running rampant through his county.
Cholera was rampant, measles, mumps, and chicken pox were deadly, and the mosquito which brought such deadly sickness- that damn little bugger!
***The Challenge of Man: A man of color and a man with pale skin look into the same evening sky and both appreciate its’ beauty. Both men have that same thin vein of blood circulating through their veins yet men with pale skin planned for war to keep men of color in bonds and chains.
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President Lincoln was the man of the hour, the man who faced the greatest challenges with his faith bolstered by his simple religion of the frontier. Life, every life in those times was simple, yet there was complexity within the simplicity. Life in those times involved clearing land, felling trees, and yes bartering whisky and grain either on the roadway or the waterways.
Hiding from the tax man was also a way of life. No matter what the status everyone met with the ‘tax man’ or hid from him. If he hid he lost everything and for a man who has nothing there is always something to be taken to be sold at auction to pay against the back taxes and it was. It might have been the ordinary like the milking stool or a chest, the clutch of hens the black kettle over the hearth, or the mule, the horse, or cow. Anything and everything was seized for auction to pay the back taxes.
The meal of the gentry was consumed from a plate of china or pewter, while the meal of the ‘working class’ was consumed from a wooden platter or a bowl. What each man ate and when he ate was determined by another or when the chores were complete.
Man survives in many ways.
There were many moral dilemmas to be encountered by both the gentry and the working class. One of those dilemmas Lincoln encountered along the road to the presidency was the institution and face of slavery. Lincoln had the temperament for the Presidency. He was a man of firm, solid, and steadfast belief in his religion yet he was congenial and socially minded he understood the essence of harmony. He was ‘sensitive’ to many persuasions that swayed politicians.
